When we moved into our 150 year old home on five acres, we named it Engedi. A place of rest, a getaway. A place where King Solomon would take his bride for a little vaca (Song of Solomon 1:14).
Moving into this peaceful country life after living in the ‘hood, was a welcome reprieve. Engedi was a name well-suited. I couldn’t believe we LIVED in this place!
Eight years later I still feel the same way about our home, and I simply thought of Engedi as the little place Solomon references.
I’m coming off a weekend spent at an adoption conference in which I heard amazing stories, took frantic notes, connected with other adoptive moms, and came home encouraged. The Holy Spirit met me there, and had something for me. I kept hearing Him whisper one word to me: REST. Which, in all honesty, did not feel like it made a lot of sense. Rest? Seems odd given the season I find myself in: homeschooling my children, keeping our home running, working hard on helping my son adjust to family life, being intentional in my marriage, etc. Rest? If I rest everything falls apart, that can’t be right. Rest seems counterproductive. Surely the Holy Spirit wasn’t really telling me to rest.
But rest is hard work. It forces you to quiet spaces where God to sheds light on the corner cob-webs of your heart. It’s hard because I have to reflect. I have to set things aside that keep me distracted and numb to the pain I don’t want to face.
Don’t we need rest in order to have strength?
How can I have strength to do my job well if I’m depleted…emotionally, spiritually, physically? After all, my family benefits from the overflow, and is hurt when I am malnourished.
Today I finished reading the ENTIRE Bible. Something that only took me like…four years, but I did it. I had read everything except for the book of Ezekiel. I kept starting it, reading a little, then going to other books. I COULD NOT get through that book. It made zero sense to me and was…well, weird. But I KNEW God had something in there for me, I just couldn’t imagine what, because I trudged through passages that felt a bit like gibberish!
I was almost to the last chapter, and I was just excited to be done. Then I read this in chapter 47, verses 10-12:
Fishermen will stand beside the sea. From Engedi to Eneglaim it will be a place for the spreading of nets. Its fish will be of very many kinds, like the fish of the Great Sea…. And on the banks, on both sides of the river, there will grow all kinds of trees for food. Their leaves will not wither, nor their fruit fail, but they will bear fresh fruit every month, because the water for them flows from the sanctuary.Their fruit will be for food, and their leaves for healing.”
And the Holy Spirit nudged me, winked, and said, “THAT is what I wanted you to see.”
Water for the flows from the Sanctuary.
Fruit for food.
Leaves for healing.
From Engedi to Eneglaim.
Our home, Engedi. A place of rest. This place we call home, is where I will water my children with love and truth, and the water will not run dry because it flows from the sanctuary. The leaves that nestle around the abundant fruit will be for healing.
My son from Haiti has had a lot of loss in his short life. I cannot begin to fathom the hurt that lies far beneath the surface of that beautiful smile. But I do not fear the future, because God has entered me in a season of rest. This rest from God will grant me water from the sanctuary. And from the sturdy vine, fruit when there’s hunger. And along with fruit, leaves…for healing.